Monday, January 6, 2020

Conor, Bliss, and Kurosawa

My predictions were right: I'm an angel again. I for some reason was all giddy as a horse all day and night yesterday. I read a whole lot and got my headphones fixed in the daytime. I went nearly 5 days without music which drove me absolutely mad. I was worried that getting my over-the-ear headphones would cost a fortune to repair but when reaching for my wallet, the girl working said, Don't worry about it, it's on me. Her name tag said Bliss. Thank you, Bliss!!!

I skipped over to the bookstore which was quite a zoo. I guess everyone's a reader on sunny Sundays in Soho! I had no interest in buying anything but it felt nice to walk amongst all the eager people and touch every book cover even the ones I could care less about.

In the evening I met Ethan for a drink. I felt like a child, in a good way. For the first time in days I was happy to be around someone. I was essentially vibrating in my seat with joy, sitting on my feet and smiling a whole lot. Ethan left and I stuck around to read a bit. It was still relatively early and the bar was quiet and cozy. I ran into some friends of friends who are visiting from the West Coast. They invited me to go see Rashomon around the corner. I sat alone in the balcony and before I knew it, I had woken up with a slight trail of drool running down my neck. I was in a daze and ran out of the theater like a frightened little baby. I stepped outside and there was a particularly dreamy amount of snow falling. My west coast acquaintances met me outside and convinced me to have a little more wine. We talked about the idols we've met, our favorite places to travel, and all the fun things you get to talk about when you hardly know much about each other. God forbid Ethan or Tess or Rewa hear again and again and again my story of meeting Björk and how when I looked into her eyes I almost had a meltdownexistentialcrisismindblowntolittlepiecesfullofregretnevershouldhavedonethat moment.

Conor picked me up from work the other evening. He is the hottest person I know. I know hotter people or I mean I know people I'm actually much more attracted to, but Conor is so classically beautiful, anyone in his presence becomes a sack of roses and rainbows and wetness. Every person he comes into contact with has near heart attack. He is your quintessential heart throb Calvin Klein Ralph Lauren looking tall guy. He has puffy blond-ish hair and a smile designed by Norman Rockwell. His hands could crush a child in one little squeeze and his legs barely fit when sitting anywhere. Every time I bring him somewhere, some girl who has gone crosseyed grabs my arm and threateningly asks me who he is. His names Conor, he likes going to the movies and is very very kind. The single best part about tall tall Conor is that despite being a sexualized hunk of a man who may be perceived as some animal boy looking to cum on to anything, he could care less and winces if you say anything of the matter. He just wants to talk to you about everything and anything. He likes Chantal Ackerman, sitting in parks, eating soup, and going to Anthology film archives 20 thousand times a week. He's always there. He's always going there. He's always coming from there. The amount of times he has left me to go to Anthology is upsetting. We can't go near the place or I will lose him. He could be shot in the face but God forbid the ambulance go by Anthology or there will be a 90 minute pit stop to the movies. When he talks to you, he sucks the air in his teeth between words and sentences. It's very endearing to me for some reason. Ticks tell all! I've tried to distinguish when and when he does not suck the air in between his teeth out of curiosity as to what may turn off the tick. Conor makes me feel like a little baby but I at the same time feel older than him. We are the same age. I'm usually funny around him but also sometimes very serious and I reach into the weird deeper parts of my brain and he will sometimes just stare at me and I'll stare back and he will laugh at me and the stupid serious things I say and then he usually leaves me to go to Anthology.


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